By Citabria Stevens
Thanda Volunteer

“‘Don’t mistake my kindness for weakness.’ It is written in graffiti at the Durban skatepark and it describes Nosipho better than anything I can say right now...”

I read that in an email I received earlier this year from the co-founder and director of Thanda After-School, an organization in rural South Africa that supports orphans of AIDS and other vulnerable children. I’d met Angela Larkan, the girl who sent the email, a few times over the past two years while helping her fundraise in New York City. She’s only a year older than I am, but she has more poignant worldly insight than anyone I can think of.

Students in Thanda After-School's Youth Education Program line up before going outside to play a game.

Angela’s email went on: “Nosipho has been an orphan most of her life. When we heard that she was throwing a 21st party for herself...we knew we wanted to be there and support her, since there was no family to throw the party. [...] Nosipho makes a speech, thanking everyone for coming to her party. Then the MC announces the father-daughter dance. I gasp as another Thanda student duly stands up, holds her, and begins dancing, in place of her father. I look around. Every person here is under 20 years old. There are no adults. ‘WHERE ARE THE ADULTS???’ I want to scream. But I know the answer. They are all dead...AIDS and poverty killed them and these kids are left here alone, throwing their own 21st parties, standing up to dance the father-daughter dance with each other.” The children's parents are dying from AIDS related diseases, mostly because they cannot afford medical treatment or proper nourishment.

I read those words over and over. Within the previous two weeks, I’d actually quietly conjured up the harebrained idea of moving to South Africa to volunteer with Thanda. That mass email sealed the deal.

A few whirlwind months later, here I am in Thanda’s office in South Africa, trying to help keep this remarkable program on its feet.

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By Ben Finley
Editorial Producer

Finley: Why do you think folks living with HIV/AIDS still face prejudices today?

White Ginder: I think the disease still has misconceptions: How you get it and the kind of people who get it. You know, I think we need to be more tolerant of people and like them for who they are not have them face prejudices.

Finley: Does it ever surprise you when people are still critical or judgmental of those living with HIV/AIDS?

White Ginder: You know, I think it’s only in this country that we have had to face the discrimination on this disease. We cannot look at it as just a disease. Ryan used to say, “Lets make this a disease and not a dirty word.” I think we just can’t seem to get over that hurdle. Only in America has this been a gay-HIV-drug-user disease. It’s everybody’s disease. If you have sex you are at risk. I think it’s so important for people to like a person for who they are and not be judgemental.

Ryan white’s mother, Jeanne White Ginder, with Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, on the day President Obama signed the Ryan White HIV/AIDS treatment extension act of 2009. (Photo by EPA)

Finley: How important do you feel it was for the president to have lifted the travel ban on people living with HIV?

White Ginder: I think that’s a big plus. I know of those rules firsthand because when Greg Louganis was in South Korea for the Olympics the government there would not let Ryan in the country because he had AIDS. So I know of those kind of rules. It was very hard because that’s when he hit his head and I think he would’ve liked to have had the support but, of course, at that time nobody knew. Here in the U.S. to not ever be able to have a World Conference on AIDS because, of course, the people who would be here would have AIDS. It’s such a loss. I think it was a great thing that he lifted the ban. We can all learn from each other. I think these people have a voice, too, and we can learn from one another.

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